Forgiveness

 The Rev. Nancy E. Gossling

Therefore, I tell you, her sins, which were many, have been forgiven; hence she has shown great love. But the one to whom little is forgiven, loves little.’ Then Jesus said to her, ‘Your sins are forgiven.’ 

We have some basic staples in our religious and spiritual lives. One is the golden rule: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. And the other is the Lord’s Prayer.

There are various translations of the Lord’s Prayer and today I want to focus specifically on the words about forgiveness. It’s a stumbling block for many people. Being unable to forgive ourselves or others or to feel that we have been forgiven creates an enormous amount of pain and grief in our lives. In fact it causes a lot of bad behavior and prevents us from living in peace.

We may have learned different ways to pray the Lord’s Prayer, and depending upon the three synoptic gospel stories, Jesus taught his disciples different things. In Luke’s gospel, Jesus said to them, “When you pray, say: “And forgive us our sins, for we ourselves forgive everyone indebted to us.’' According to the book Gospel Parallels, this translation is probably closer to the original words of Jesus. Note that it includes both the words ‘sins’ and ‘indebtedness’ in the process of forgiveness.

Mark, which is considered to be the first gospel written, is much more succinct. In it Jesus says, “Whenever you stand praying, forgive, if you have anything against anyone; so that your Father in heaven may also forgive you; but if you do not forgive others, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.” Now we hear the word 'trespasses'. As in the case of the chicken and the egg, which comes first? In Mark’s translation, Jesus tells us that we must forgive others before God will forgive us.

Matthew, an expanded version of Mark’s gospel, is considered the more liturgical version of the Lord’s Prayer. In it Jesus says to his disciples, “And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you; but if you do not forgive others, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.” Matthew’s version is the kitchen sink variety of the Lord’s Prayer. We have debts, debtors, trespasses, and quid pro quos all in one.

So which is it? Trespasses, sins or debts? And who is forgiving whom, who forgives first, and what exactly are we forgiving when we use these words?

Let’s take trespasses. It means you’ve crossed a boundary. You’ve gone into someone else’s property, crossed a border, or violated their physical or emotional space. For example, news reporters chasing politicians into bathrooms. Regardless of the written signs that have been posted (wear a mask), or the verbal warnings that have been spoken, “don’t go there” or “don’t do that”, you have overstepped a boundary. When we say, “Forgive us our trespasses”, we are asking forgiveness for these boundary violations.

In today’s gospel story, the unnamed woman at the feet of Jesus has a reputation; she is “that woman” who has crashed the men’s party. Considered both a trespasser and a sinner, the Pharisee tells us that Jesus should have known what kind of woman was touching him. Occasionally my Dad, God rest his soul, would say to me, “Be careful, Nancy. Your halo is slipping!” I would forget that I share a common bond with all humanity, that like the Pharisee and this woman, I too am a sinner.  I make myself the judge and jury of others, trespassing into areas of God’s domain. 

Sin. Oftentimes we limit our understanding of sin as merely doing something wrong. Knowingly and unknowingly,  I do what I know I shouldn’t do. I say things that are insensitive, indeed even prejudiced. I act unprofessionally. I cheat on my taxes, my business account, or maybe even my spouse. I lie, dissemble, ignore, and deny the truth, and so I sin in my words and deeds, which can also mean to “miss the mark.” 

Perhaps my intentions were good and yet the impact of my words and actions are hurtful. My human behavior missed the target, the bulls-eye that Jesus holds up for us. We live in glass houses, which is why Jesus said to the crowd,, “Let the one without sin cast the first stone!”

Jesus also talks about two debtors, that is you and me. Yes, Jesus compares the amounts of these debts, and yet in Anglican moral theology, a sin is a sin is a sin, no matter how great, no matter how small. There are no venial or mortal sins in Anglicanism, just sins. 

In a recent Zoom webinar, I listened to Dr. Fred Luskin talk about forgiveness from a medical and neurological perspective. If we do not forgive ourselves and others, regardless of the pain we have endured or that we have created, we carry burdens preventing us from living freely and peacefully. In his book entitled Forgive For Good, he offers a metaphor that shows the practical consequences of harboring grief, sadness and pain, of harboring anger and resentment for too long. They are like planes circling an airport and not being able to land, nor allowing other planes to land either. 

Once we release our hands from the controls, drop all the fuel and baggage that weighs us down, and turn everything over to God, we let God be the pilot of our planes. Knowing that we have been forgiven by God, we are able to forgive ourselves and others, and land our planes safely. Forgiven for our trespasses, sins, and debts, we can love God, our neighbors, indeed even ourselves, more fully and freely. Ultimately we will live and die more peacefully. 

So let go and let God. Forgive for the good of yourself and for the good of others. And remember it’s a process, repeated daily over our lifetimes. We may need to circle the target and the tarmac many times before we can land. While some things and some people may seem unforgivable, God is the ultimate judge. “Forgive them for they know not what they do,” said Jesus from the cross. And today to “that woman” (a trespasser, debtor, and sinner), “Your faith has saved you; go in peace.” Isn’t that what we all ultimately want?

Luke 7:36-50

One of the Pharisees asked Jesus* to eat with him, and he went into the Pharisee’s house and took his place at the table. And a woman in the city, who was a sinner, having learned that he was eating in the Pharisee’s house, brought an alabaster jar of ointment. She stood behind him at his feet, weeping, and began to bathe his feet with her tears and to dry them with her hair. Then she continued kissing his feet and anointing them with the ointment. Now when the Pharisee who had invited him saw it, he said to himself, ‘If this man were a prophet, he would have known who and what kind of woman this is who is touching him—that she is a sinner.’ Jesus spoke up and said to him, ‘Simon, I have something to say to you.’ ‘Teacher,’ he replied, ‘speak.’ ‘A certain creditor had two debtors; one owed five hundred denarii,* and the other fifty. When they could not pay, he cancelled the debts for both of them. Now which of them will love him more?’ Simon answered, ‘I suppose the one for whom he cancelled the greater debt.’ And Jesus* said to him, ‘You have judged rightly.’ Then turning towards the woman, he said to Simon, ‘Do you see this woman? I entered your house; you gave me no water for my feet, but she has bathed my feet with her tears and dried them with her hair. You gave me no kiss, but from the time I came in she has not stopped kissing my feet. You did not anoint my head with oil, but she has anointed my feet with ointment. Therefore, I tell you, her sins, which were many, have been forgiven; hence she has shown great love. But the one to whom little is forgiven, loves little.’ Then he said to her, ‘Your sins are forgiven.’ But those who were at the table with him began to say among themselves, ‘Who is this who even forgives sins?’ And he said to the woman, ‘Your faith has saved you; go in peace.’